Mindfuck

Okay, I have mentioned the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy once before, but I recently found out that someone is making a movie from it. I have been waiting for this movie for a damn long time, and I am really psyched that it's finally coming out. I've seen two release dates, March 6th and April 29th, but I can wait--I've waited almost five years since I first read the books.

However, I think that in the grandest tradition of novel-to-film media, someone fucked it up.

In the book, and the BBC TV series which I hold to be the second authority, Marvin the Paranoid Android was a large robot. In the trailer, he looks like some kind of chibi-version of himself.

Originally, the Guide itself looked like a calculator with lots of push-buttons. In the trailer, it opens like a book, but has some kind of LCD-type screen.

Originally, Zaphod Beeblebrox had three arms and two heads. In the trailer: two arms, one head. But, I think I saw a really short scene at the end where he was holding a glass in each hand and putting ice in them with a third. Also in this scene, a second head popped up under the first, so they may not have fucked that up too badly.

In the trailer, the Heart of Gold just looks..wrong. It was originally described as looking like a running shoe. I've had a nice, clean image of it in my head for years. Now it looks like a more aesthetically pleasing version of the Borg sphere from Star Trek: First Contact.

I remember nothing about the protagonists being smacked in the face with objects that appear to be shovels on what appears to be the planet Magrathea.

I saw no mention or appearance of the following:

• Slartibartfast
• Infinite Improbability Drive
• Babel Fish
• Mice
• the sperm whale and pot of petunias (Agrajag)
• Deep Thought
• the number 42

Also, I think it's a Disney movie, and I am a registered Disney-hater. I even have a card.

Finally, I pray (figure of speech) they didn't try to get all 5 books into the one movie, because that would be a big mistake.

Now, despite all this, I'm still going to see the movie, on opening day if I can. This may be the one movie I ever camp for tickets to see. But I really hope it's not so bad it ruins things for me, because people are going to see this who haven't read the book. If it's good, they might get the book, and more people should be reading it. Of course, they won't have anything to compare to to see if it's bad, but still...