New Skin! Yay!

In case you hadn't noticed yet (not likely), I've got a new blogskin. Found at at blogskins.com, yadda yadda, credits are on the links page. Isn't HTML fun? I realize some of you probably can't see all of it; I can't on my home PC, but then, I know what it says, don't I? It's still partially under construction, but with any luck I'll have it all done by 10 tonight. I've still got to do some edits in the code for the profile, and I'm trying to insert one of the Haloscan comment links. I'll be getting some help with that if I can. If you see something that really needs to be fixed, and the comment box isn't up, most of you know one of my email addresses.

Update @ 8:41 PM: So, with a little bit of tweaking I got the comment thing to work, and got it in the right place. Thanks to Jenny and Annie for that, I took a look at the source for their blogs to figure out where to put it. Does anyone know what I should do with that "taggie board" space? I was thinking of a chatterbox, but I'm not sure. Suggestions welcome.

Enough=Enough

So..... I'm going to be a bit..... personal here. I'm going to use names, 'cause the people involved, and the people who know about it, are pretty much the only ones who come to this site.

Two of my friends broke up rather violently... I guess it was a year and a half ago, now. When I say, two of my friends, I don't mean that I was friends with one person and became friends with the other. I'd known Jenny since we were little kids at Brannen Elementary, and I'd known Jake for a long time, too.

Anyway.... there was this whole big blowup, that I won't go into. You all know one side of the story, or the other. Neither side is entirely correct, as there were no objective observers. The reason I'm writing for this is because of the things that have been cycling up and down since then.

There's a lot of hate on either side, and from time to time I've felt like I've been caught in the middle. You see, I'm a bastard and an asshole, but I'm also fiercely loyal to my friends. Loyalty, for me, is non-negotiable. Until you give me an absolutely irrefutable reason to leave you behind, I will not. But this isn't about me, is it?

Anyway..... things have been weird and crappy for the last year and a half. Jake hates Jenny.... but then, he doesn't. Jenny despises Jake..... I think. And I.... am am unwilling messenger.

Jake has made it his mission in life to show Jenny "how stupid she is." He says this every time her name comes up, and it pisses me off immensely. Jenny is not stupid. She's devastatingly intelligent, to be honest, and I'm glad to know her.

Jenny "doesn't want to breathe the same air" as Jake. I'm not sure why.... he's usually not sick. Jake is not a bad person, he just has a piss-poor attitude. I do too, actually.

It's been a long time, people. Why can't we have some reconciliation, here? Everyone involved did something wrong, and everyone who's still around can admit that, right? I'm certain that there can be, if not true peace, than an end to overt hostility. It's possible, but there's only one question.....

Who's going to make the first move?

De-Religiosity!

To begin, I am not the following:

• Anti-christian
• Anti-religion
• Evil. Well.... not really. I think. Right?
  
• The Antichrist

Okay? We all understand this, right? Now, onto the good stuff.


I think I opened some eyes today. Well, I suppose I should say we opened some eyes Wednesday, we being me and Jake.

There's this kid in our Math Models class, who is very, very religious. Naturally I won't tell you his name, we'll call him "B." He's a smart kid, though you might not think so on first meeting. I've known him for years, and I'm glad to know him, he's a good guy. But like I said, he's very religous.

Let's get something established here: I am not antireligous. I think faith is a great thing to have, and I'm rather peeved that my mind won't allow me to have it. I simply do not think that people should follow the Bible, or the Koran, or the Torah, or whatever, without ever thinking about it, which is what lots of people seem to do. I think everyone should question all authority at all times, and that certainly includes religion. Here's some of the ways I think it should be questioned.

1. We all recognize that the bible was written by men

The fact that it was written by men means it is colored by man's perceptions. I don't care if God himself if standing in front of you and dictating it directly; you're going to hear what you want to hear, and that's what's going to be written down. Moses put down the laws of the Hebrews, right? It really doesn't matter who did, for this, but let's say it was Moses, okay? [Pure supposition begins here] Suppose Moses was really, really grossed out by homosexuals. He was the first in a long line of homophobes, and decided that it might be a good idea to do something to get rid of them. So, he took the dictation from God, and then.... added some stuff. Also, correct me if I'm wrong, but the bible says nothing about abortion. So shouldn't we be smacking anyone who says "God says abortion is wrong!" Wouldn't that be blasphemy, or at least eisogesis?

2. Could you send good people to hell?

It is believed by most monotheists that those who do not share their faith will burn in hell, or whatever. Imagine this scenario: you are God for a day. Maybe you won a contest or something, I don't know, it's your imagination. Anyway, during your day as God, someone dies. For this argument, let us assume that you are the Judeo-Christian God, and and the man who dies, let's say he's an atheist. Now, he is an atheist, but he has led an exemplary life. He did the regular kid things that are "wrong," such as lying to his parents. We all did that at some point, right? Anyway, he has led an exemplary life as an adult, unknowingly following all the teachings of the church. He dies saving a little girl from a fire. He is pretty much on the fast track to wings, harp, and halo.

But he's an atheist.

What do you do? Could you, as a loving God, send this man to hell? Do you think God Himself can? Do you think he should? God's supposed to know all of us, knitted us together in the womb, etc. Suppose you knew the guy that well? Could you send him to hell then?

3. So, are you absolutely certain you're right?

There's no way to prove God. There is no equation for the divine, no empirical evidence, no scientific process to definitively solve the question of God. You believe you are right, and that what your book says is what you should live by. But what if you're not? Have you ever thought that you might be wrong? This brings us back to question 2: If you are wrong, don't you hope the right people's God is a bit more forgiving than the one you believe in? Uh-oh..... suppose you are wrong, and all your life you've called the people who were right names like "pagan" and "heathen." What does that mean for your immortal soul? And what if no one was right? The theological implications are simply staggering! If no one is right... what happens when we die? Suppose God is really pissed at us 'cause we never figured it out! We'd all be screwed!

4. Do you honestly think God is going to pay particular attention to your prayers, or in fact you in general?

How many people are hanging onto this rock now? Still 6-point-something billion, isn't it? That's a whole lot of people, most of whom are praying to one god or another. And many of the prayers are utter bullshit. "Please, God, let the Angels win the pennant," and such shit. So what do you think the odds are that yours are getting through? And suppose you're one of the people with one of the bullshit prayers? You've run up a huge list of stupid prayers, and at this point even the angel secretary is dumping your requests directly into the ephemral shredder. Then all of the sudden you have a terminal disease, and start praying in earnest, but.... at the same time your team gets into the World Series/Superbowl/Rose Bowl/what the hell ever. The angel starts dumping your stuff even faster, and you're dead as a doornail in a few months. Also, it's kind of hard to believe that he's listening to some well-off middle-class american than some poor guy in Africa who has AIDS, E.Coli, and is starving. He'd rather listen to your pleas for a new season of Trigun or Desperate Housewives or Chapelle's Show (I've got a wide audience here), than some poor guy in Siberia who has to eat snow to survive. You're just bitching, these guys are dying. You really think he's going to help you?

I'm sure there was much more to the argument than that, but I've been working on this post for several days, off and on, and I can't remeber any more of it. I know this post made some people mad, but I really hope it made some people think, too. Comments, please.

Randomity

So what's up with all the fucking angst? Why are people who should be happy, not happy? People who have a boyfriend or girlfriend, or a job and thus money, or a licence-- in short many of the things I wish I had-- whining and complaining and acting like fucking emo's while I'm over here cracking evil jokes and laughing my ass off pretty much constantly? The only people I know who aren't always talking about how fucking bad they have it, I communicate with only through bits and bytes. While I may complain from time to time about things being bad, it certainly isn't fucking constant, and I at least try to make it funny and amuse people while complaining.

+=+=+=+=+=+

Speaking of emo.... can you think of anything less useful for someone to be? I can't. All the little bastards do is smoke and pretend to hate everything.

"Oh, god, I hate my life. I can go down to Hot Topic with daddy's money and buy myself an entire wardrobe in one afternoon. I hate the world. I've got lots of friends who are just like me. I hate my family. I pretend to commit suicide because then people think I'm cool and edgy."

There appears to be absolutely no point to this crap! They're halfway between Goth, which is kind of cool, and wussy-nerd-dumbass. They need to fucking choose.

+=+=+=+=+=+

I want to move to California.

Ehhhh.... college?

So, if you didn't know, I'm a senior in Highschool, planning to graduate. This means within a year, I, and many of my closest friends, are going to be heading to one college or another every morning, Monday through Friday. I'm not sure I'm happy about this. I know most people aren't happy about change, but I like to think I'm one of the few people who embrace change, just for the challenges it brings. So, while I'm happy that I will likely be away from home, and attending classes that I will enjoy, I'm a bit... not frightened, men aren't allowed to be frightened. Let's say worried.

Now, Ids hazard a guess that at this point most of you are thinking I'm worried that I'll be away from home. F*ck that shit, I want to get away from here. What bothers me about moving out of here is that I will be away from my friends, my teachers, all the people who keep me sane.

I'm not sure where I'll go to college. I'm looking real closely at Brazosport College and Lon Morris, both of which are two-year. I was impressed by the Honors program presentation at U of H the other night. Also, it has been suggested that I attend college in California, which might be pretty cool too. After all, that's where Bigfoot is. I'd like to get that sucker skinned and stuffed. Plus I think I'd be much happier there than here, location-wise, and there's at least one person there who could keep me sane. I think the best plan I have for now is to go to BC or Lon Morris for a year, then transfer to either UofH or somewhere in California. Two of the people who are instrumental in my maintenance of logic, reason, and control will be going to BC, so that looks most likely right now.

But I think I'd be a bit... lost... without some of the people around here. Jake is moving to Georgia, or at least he wants to. I don't think I could take Georgia for very long. I've never been good at suffering fools, and hillbillies are near the top of that particular list. I've not heard plans from anyone else, but I know someone who's already going to school in another country. I expect that I'll be near enough to someone that we could talk, but I'm not sure it'll be someone I'll want to talk to.

I suppose I could keep in touch with blogs, email, and Instant Messaging, but you know as well as I that it's not the same. I guess it would be worse for people talking to me, since I refuse to use chatspeak and emoticons. I have little enough emotional involvement as is, and I don't need to confuse people with such foolishness as emoticons. I don't use chatspeak because it's just another perversion of the english language, and screws up what the rappers haven't destroyed already.

Anyway.... I'm sure I'll do good in college, much better than highschool. At one point someone thought I was "talented," so I got to take the ACT in junior high. Apparently my test scores were rather impressive. I took the SAT not too long ago, and did rather good, excepting math, of course. I just took the ACT again last weekend, and though the math was a small slice of hell, I think I did better this time. I'm hoping my test scores will be enough to get me some kind of scholarship, 'cause my grades sure as hell won't.

Hey, folks, guess who got dropped off at home in a squad car last night?

That's right, they finally got yours truly into one of those rust buckets. I was hanging out with some kids from the school, and before I hooked up with them, a mailbox had been broken. The kid who did it, we'll call him "A," had been skating along, and jumped off his board to run alongside it. He hit the curb funny and slammed into the mailbox, taking it off about halfway up. Rather than simply going up to the house and telling what happened, they took off running. I joined up with them shortly after. A kid who lived in the house saw what happened. He and his brother started following us around in a truck, keeping to the streets where they could see us, while we went off the roads into the ditches.

No, that's not stalking at all.

Anyway, we went into this large, empty park, and the truck drove by. A few seconds later, the cops showed up. By the time I knew what was going on, and turned around, the guy was already getting out. He tells us to get against the car, then says, "I just want you boys to know that if you run from me you'll be in some big fucking trouble." Right there I knew that I, personally, was in little to no trouble. If the cop was that relaxed, and wasn't screaming, I was good since I didn't do anything. I know now that we most likely could have run, and gotten away, since we know the area better than any cop, and know a couple dozen good places to hide, but at the same time I'm glad we didn't. I was a bit impressed that they'd actually caught us, and I guess I didn't want to tarnish their moment.

So, he takes us to the house, and the little kid, a friend of my brother's, narcs like a little bitch, and apparently added to his story a bit. He said that he had watched for about 5 minutes as "A" had outright attacked the mailbox, punching it, kicking it, smacking it with his skateboard... none of which happened. Now, let me tell you about the two families involved in this incident. "A's" family is not well-off. I mean, unless you're reading this at a school or library, you're paying for an Internet connection, and you bought a PC. That's not cheap, folks. They probably couldn't do that, and this is in an era when everyone and their dog and their dog's fleas have computers. The other family? Two bigass trucks in the driveway, that probably guzzle gas faster than a stoner can empty a twinkie warehouse. Both trucks are driven fairly often. I've not seen into the garage, which means there might be another two cars in there. The house is good-sized, and on the creek, which may be a shitty creek, but it still drives up the property value a bit. The people who live their, or at least their sons, aren't the most law-abding people in this town. I mean, they're not criminals, but their kids drive their dirtbikes in the street (illegal), blow up mailboxes (also illegal), and fire off shotguns in the backyard (what do you think?). Normally, none of this would bother me overmuch, except for a few things. First, the family who's mailbox was replaced by the time it got dark wants to sue the other family.

FOR WHAT, MOTHERFUCKERS?!?!

Second, the family who's mailbox was hit wants the charge upped from criminal mischief, which really isn't that bad, to criminal misdemeanor. And for what? Satisfaction?

IT'S A FUCKING MAILBOX, ASSHOLES!!!!!

Third: I have been told that the kid who saw it gave a statement to the effect that "A" worked the mailbox over. It's not that hard to break a mailbox off, alright? You don't need to hit it, kick it, hit it with a skateboard, and the finally throw yourself at it. All you need is a bat. Now, his lying doesn't bother me much, he's a fucking narc and I have neither respect nor concern for little bitches like him. But the thing that bothers me is that the cops have decided to take away the court case. Apparently "A" has had some trouble before, and is on probation or something. What this means is that the people who were there and are not little attention whores don't get to tell their side of the story, and "A" will be going straight to boot camp... which his family will have to pay for.

* * *

This.... this is why I hate this society. In a culture where one family sues another family, and does their best to destroy a kid's life, all over a fuckin' accident, what's left to respect? What is there for the level-headed people among us to enjoy? I mean, it's fine with me if you enjoy fucking someone else over, but there is a point where you have to fucking stop. Okay? If you're suing a poor family, you don't ever, ever get to talk about morality again. You don't get to share your opinion on gay marriage or religion or arbortion or gun control or drugs or any fucking thing. It pisses me off so much that people can just get away with this kind of thing, and that's why things have to fucking change, right the fuck NOW. Here are our options. You and I, the next generation to be in control, can sit on our asses and wait for our turn, wait for our time to fix everything we've let our parents and grandparents fuck up, or we can do something about it, now, when we still can, and before we're too busy trying to save the last peices of social security and civil rights and our own lives. I've made my decision, and that's why you're reading this. This, right now, is the only way I can try to make things change. The only way I can challenge the status quo and try to fix things. I'll be doing more and more as time moves on, of course, but right now, you all have to make a choice, as to wether you're going to just plod along, or wether you're actually doing something. Wether you're going to let things stay as they are for now, and get worse further on; or if you will do something, ANYTHING, while there's still time.

Renaissance Fair (Faire? Fayr? Fayre? WHO CARES!?!)

I'm going to the Renaissance Fair with my AP Euro class on Thursday. The bus leaves at 6.30 for some little town I've never even heard of; apparently the only thing they have going for them is the fair itself. I was a bit reluctant to go, at first. I figured, there's only three peices to go where you could possibly meet someone even geekier than myself: An anime or videogame convention, which is something I would like to attend; a Dungeons and Dragons mass tournament, which I would never go to, even to save what little soul I have left; and a Renaissance festival. I guess my list is down to two, now.

Anyway, I figured, I already paid my cash for a ticket, so I might as well spend a bit more cash. I bought a costume in a one-shot Halloween store they put up in the mall, where the gap store used to be. I like the costume, it's exactly my kind of thing.

It's a friar's robe.

Isn't that wonderful? You all know me, and know how I'm ultra-critical of religion. I'm the last person you'd ever expect to see dressed as a holy man, right? That's why the costume is so perfect! I'm working on making a large wooden cross to hang from my neck, and I might carve some bible verses into a peice of wood I can whack myself in the face with (three people got that refrence. The rest of you are scratching your heads.). I would have gotten the preist costume at Hot Topic, but it looked more like George Carlin as Cardinal Glick in Dogma than my conception of a renaissance Catholic clergyman. By the way, it looks like Hot Topic is out of the Naruto headbands. If I find out any of you have one, I'm afraid I'll have to kill you and take it off your cold, dead body.